Therapists
HARLENE M. DELA TORRE-MCILWAIN, MHC-LP (she/her/Siya)
Associate therapist
Are you often self-critical, with a negative or harsh voice in your head? Do you experience shame, “not good enough-ness”, and unworthiness? Maybe you’ve had these feelings and thoughts for a long time, learned from past traumatic experiences or an unsupportive environment you grew up in. These experiences are painful and can stop you from living a more rewarding life. If this sounds familiar, I understand and I’m here to help. I specialize in working with anxiety, shame, self-criticism, relationship difficulties, life transitions, sexuality, and gender.
As a queer, first-generation immigrant of Southeast Asian descent, my passion is working with LGBTQIA+, BIPOC, neurodivergent populations, immigrants, and people living in marginalized bodies. My therapy is gender and neurodivergent affirming. It is tailored to your needs while recognizing the broader sociocultural systems you live in.
No matter where you are in your life, I will meet you with curiosity, compassion, and humor. Together, we’ll create a safe, accepting space where you can bring your whole, authentic self. My hope for you is to feel free, to engage in patterns and relationships that support your potential, and to help you feel comfortable and safe in your body and community.
Q & A
How would you describe your therapy style?
Curiosity, compassion, and humor are the key elements of my therapy style. Because I work with many clients who have struggled with complex trauma, s*** can get heavy and at times, injecting a healthy and appropriate dose of levity into sessions has helped them cope with the heaviness of their emotions. I bring my whole self to sessions and I welcome clients to share their whole, authentic selves and all parts of their experience in a safe and accepting space. My goal is to help clients feel free, comfortable, and connected in their selves and lives.
What books have made the biggest impact on your life?
bell hooks’s All About Love – she skillfully wrote how important it is to love ourselves and others with care, compassion, and respect. Showing how our personal and public lives are interwoven, she also looked at how love can change our lives and the world, and how it can heal the wounds and pain caused by racism, sexism, and other kinds of injustice.
Alexander and Ann Shulgin’s PiHKAL and TiHKAL – if you want to know more from the pioneers of psychedelic research firsthand, these books from this power couple documented the synthesis, effects, and history of hundreds of psychoactive compounds for their potential therapeutic use.
The Four Agreements – for its powerful, timeless, and easy to remember (but often not-so-easy to implement) lessons: Be Impeccable with Your Word, Don’t Take Anything Personally, Don’t Make Assumptions, and Always Do Your Best.
Are there any particular areas of focus that really excite you?
One area of focus that really excites me is the use of psychedelics, such as psilocybin, to treat mental health conditions, such as depression, anxiety, and trauma. I am fascinated by the research that shows how psychedelics can induce profound changes in brain activity, perception, and consciousness, and how these changes can lead to lasting improvements in well-being and quality of life. I am also passionate about helping people who choose to use psychedelics in a safe and responsible way, by providing them with harm reduction education, preparation, and integration support. I believe that psychedelics can be powerful tools for personal transformation and healing, if used with intention, respect, and care.
